How can I support someone whose behaviour has changed due to dementia?

Sometimes dementia may alter a person's emotions and actions.

The differences may be subtle or dramatic and may result in behaviours and feelings that are uncharacteristic for the individual.

Elena was the first to notice that things had started to change with her mum Francesca, who lived with dementia.

“I noticed she started forgetting things,” Elena said.

“She forgot where she put her money or parked the car.

“She became paranoid about people coming into her home. That’s when I knew there was something seriously wrong.”

These behavioural changes led to Elena seeking out a diagnosis for her Mum.

“It took a long time but she was eventually diagnosed with dementia,” Elena said. “We were then able to put things in place such as a Power of Attorney which was helpful down the track.”

Finding ways to manage behavioural change

When Tamara’s mother Margaret, who lived with dementia, began reacting negatively to her reflection in the mirror, the family made some simple changes around the house.

“She would be abusing the person in the mirror one minute and then the next minute she would be talking to her as a friend,” said Tamara (pictured above with her mother Margaret).

“I didn’t want my kids to remember her like that so we covered up all the mirrors in the house to get rid of reflections.

“My sister would take her to the hairdressers every week as an outing and her hairdresser would do her hair away from the mirror.

“It’s about finding people in the community who really understand what they’re going through as well.”

What can I do to help?

If you notice changes in the mood or behaviour of someone close to you with dementia, it can be helpful to start keeping a diary or log of what’s happening.

This can help you to better understand what’s triggering these changes and what works to help them.

Things to make a note of include:

• what specifically happened such as how they changed, what they did or said
• when it happened
• who was involved
• what was happening around them just before it happened
• who was affected
• how you and other people responded and whether it helped.

Go over the events you’ve listed regularly to look for patterns, causes and useful strategies to help.

You can also show your diary to a doctor or specialist for advice, or call the National Dementia Helpline to discuss what you are observing.

If you live with dementia or support someone with the condition you can contact the free, confidential National Dementia Helpline on 1800 100 500, any time of the day or night, for more information, advice and support.

You can also find out more on our mood and behaviour change page.