Meet Dementia Advocate and Peer Leader Stephen Slavin
The following contribution was written by Dementia Advocate and Peer Leader Stephen Slavin
After 16 years of growing in my knowledge and experiences through my wife’s decline with dementia, I wanted to “give back” and help the agencies that supported me on my journey as a carer.
I grew up in a national park and spent my working life caring for the natural environment by providing for visitor recreation and education facilities in national parks and state forest in South Australia and Western Australia.
While doing that, I have always enjoyed coaching and encouraging people to realise their potential.
With this background and a positive attitude to life, I wanted to support other men caring for their dementia partners and help them to problem-solve their issues.
Joining the Dementia Australia Connecting Peers Program has given me the opportunity to do that rewarding work.
I am especially interested in helping male carers as I was shocked after my wife’s initial diagnosis that some medical professionals believed as a male I wouldn’t be able care for her at home, and suggested residential care.
I knew that I was the best person to care for my best friend and partner of 40 years, and also that I was capable of learning the skills and developing the support systems I needed to accomplish that objective. Telling me I probably couldn’t do it, was like waving a red rag at a bull!
Supporting other men around Australia is fulfilling for me when I hear in a conversation that they are realising their ability to do the job of caring, and also that they are using some tips and clues I have suggested to solve their home-life problems.
After a few conversations they start to sound more positive about maintaining their current lifestyle with their loved one and are perhaps starting to be rewarded by having an even deeper relationship with their partner.
Whether we like it or not, our society has tended to allocate caring within the family to women, and so men are unskilled and usually unprepared to care for their partner when it is required.
They need more help and training to be able to function in this role, particularly help from other men who are already doing it.
That is why I believe the Connecting Peers program is so important.
If you would like to become a Peer Leader or learn more about the Connecting Peers program please contact the team at peer.support@dementia.org.au