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“We initially noticed small things – mood changes, agitation and repeating what she was saying”

Friday, 19 July 2024Personal stories
Liane with her mother Dorothy

Before Liane’s mother Dorothy was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease, she was an outgoing and social person.

But when Liane and her family noticed little changes, they knew they needed to find out why things were changing.

“Her cooking was deteriorating,” said Liane (pictured above with her mother Dorothy).

“Food wasn’t being baked to perfection and mum used to love to cook. Meals were getting burned and being served at the table.

“She was losing the ability to do the things she did so well.”

And it wasn’t just physical, there were also cognitive changes.

“You would ask her a question and there was a blank stare back,” Liane said.

“She also didn’t seem fully engaged in conversations.”

While it wasn’t an easy thing to do, Liane knew they needed to seek medical help. A specialist confirmed a dementia diagnosis for Dorothy.

“At first we felt at loss and some family members didn’t want to believe there was something wrong.”

While Dorothy is now in the advanced stages of living with dementia, it still wasn’t easy for Liane and her family to learn to live with Dorothy’s changing behaviour.

However, it’s became somewhat easier over time with more awareness.

“Now we make sure we take the time to try to understand what she is feeling and thinking,” Liane said.

“There often isn’t enough patience taken to understand this, when behaviour changes. It's important not to get frustrated and to remain calm.”

Small changes in the early stages

Unlike Liane and Dorothy, Patrick and his partner Janet are just starting to learn to live with new changes.

Janet has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease and Patrick has noticed small differences in her behaviour that others haven’t.

“Most of her friends and family haven’t picked up on anything, but I have because it’s with us day to day,” Patrick said.

“I'm watching the slow subtle changes.

“Janet has started to get frustrated sometimes when she can’t remember something.

“She was disorientated once on the bus – she got on the wrong one and instead of coming home went the other way.

“So far, I’m only a bit apprehensive because I know this is the beginning of it all and these changes will likely develop more intensely. So I am a little bit anxious.”

But Patrick does have a plan to help both of them for when the changes will likely increase.

“I’ll keep a written record in a journal so I can see what might be triggers for Janet and then know which responses from me are appropriate,” he said.

“For now I’m trying to keep Janet’s life as normal as we can.

“She’s very aware right now of her behaviours but I know that won’t last forever. We are preparing for that.”

How to live well with changes in behaviour

To discuss more tips and strategies for managing changes in behaviour contact the National Dementia Helpline for advice and support at any time on 1800 100 500, live chat at dementia.org.au/helpline/webchat or email helpline@dementia.org.au.

We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week 365 days a year.

 

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Last updated
16 September 2024